Friday, January 3, 2014

Seven Weird Tricks to Jump-Start Your Year

1. Get your hair cut so short that you look like a monkey. Enjoy the reactions of your friends.

2. Start a brand new email account under an assumed name. Forget the password.

3. Research your forbears on Discover a relative of your father's who married her half-brother and gave birth to several children listed by the Canadian census taker as being of unsound mind.

4. Buy a new pair of pajamas. Bed Head is a good brand. Wear them to watch television.

5. Rip the "do not remove" tag off your mattress or pillow. Use it to pledge yourself to the Wrong Thing Society.

6. Check out this from the British Library:
One million images, all in the public domain. Use one of them to design a book cover. Or use several.

7. Go outside and run around in the snow like a maniac. Maybe we won't get any more.

© 2014 Kate Gallison


  1. So, I loved the British Library Link I liked the image from Additional and Discarded Poems which is evidently part of a Tennyson collection. Having hefted a few volumes of Tennyson in my time, I was shocked to learn he had discarded anything.

    1. If you skip to the end there's an entire alphabet of medieval monograms that look almost as if they're from the hands of Gutenberg himself. People with energy and crewel embroidery equipment might blow these up and do something artistic with them, maybe on a pillow.

  2. Before venturing out into the snow: a warning. I went out this morning to shovel, and a drift hid the bottom step from the front porch. A face plant is not a snow angel.

  3. Sheila, OUCH! Hope you're ok!!! Tune in to Ch. 1 and our new Mayor Bill will show you how to shovel snow!!! tjs