Sometimes one finds oneself in such a predicament. Many people have brothers-in-law or childhood friends who produce terrible novels and then insist that all their relatives and childhood friends review them on Amazon. This happens quite frequently now that self-publishing is so easy.
Fortunately for me, my friends and acquaintances are all good writers, and my relatives don't write books. Not everyone is so lucky, however. As I was reading the Dear Abby column it struck me that it would be in the public interest to design an all-purpose review you can use if ever you are backed into a corner. Any additions you can think of will be welcome; post them in the comments. The five stars are optional, but your brother-in-law will love them.
[BOOK TITLE] * * * * *
I can recommend [BOOK TITLE] without qualification. [AUTHOR] has produced an astonishing work of fiction, one that will live in my memory for a long time. This is quite a book. I couldn't put it down. (Fast enough.)
[Mention the name of the main character, and as much of the plot as you could stand to read.]
A real page turner. If [BOOK TITLE] is the sort of thing you like, you're sure to like this book.